Time

TIME. We all get exactly the same amount, but sometimes I wonder how others seem to be able to do so much more in a day than I seem to get done. I have so much I want to accomplish, and was even foolish enough to believe that when I retired from public schools a few years ago, I would have all the time I needed to write and pursue photography. HA! Once people realize you don't "work", suddenly you're the go-to person for errands, babysitting, chatting, etc. I finally threw up my hands and found another job teaching outside of public schools which helped for a while, but once again my writing and freelancing went on the back burner. Then my life took another turn. This last year has been so erratic with the illness of both parents, my mom's passing and taking time off from work to be a stay-at-home care giver. I'm in desperate need of re-organizing my schedule and getting a handle on how I spend my time.

I know I need a schedule and routine, but with caring for a father with Alzheimer's, my schedule revolves around his activity levels which have no rhyme or reason. He goes days without sleeping more than an hour or two before finally crashing and sleeping for hours on end. I was handling it OK for a while, but now I'm back to work two days a week and have someone sitting with him. Even with the help, I sometimes I feel so sleep deprived I can't function. Only things with the highest priority get accomplished on any given day. I am working on a placement for him in a state veteran's home, as much as that breaks my heart, because it is now in his best interest and for his safety. But it may yet be weeks before he gets in.

My plan for now is to make a TO DO list broken into three categories: Household, Finances, and Freelance. I'm not adding Work to the list, because it is the one thing in my life at the moment that has a definite schedule and routine and my current position does not require that I bring work home. I intend to set up goals that I want to accomplish in a given week rather than in a given day as this will allow flexibility on the days Daddy is in perpetual motion. I think having a check-list will have the added benefit of keeping track of how much I am actually getting done instead of dwelling on all the things that I can't find the time or energy to do right now.

In the end, I think I will be happy that I had this time with my father and the other stuff really isn't going to matter in the big scheme of things. TIME, spend it wisely on people and not the pursuit of things.